Episodes
Tuesday Apr 03, 2018
#20: Doing the Work Part 3
Tuesday Apr 03, 2018
Tuesday Apr 03, 2018
Doing the Work: Part 3
Have you ever decided you wanted to accomplish something and then repeatedly find yourself NOT doing the things required to achieve that outcome? If so, welcome to the human race!
This episode is Part 3 in our series on Doing the Work.
In Doing the Work Part 1, we discussed:
- Setting realistic and compelling goals
- Identifying the specific actions necessary to achieve that goal
- Creating an empowered mindset in order to consistently do the work
In Doing the Work Part 2, we dug into the stories we tell ourselves that keep us stuck and how to move past your negative self-talk and build belief in yourself.
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In this episode, Doing the Work Part 3, we will discuss the influence our social network has on our habits, goals, and motivation to “do the work”.
We all know from experience that our friends and family exert powerful influence over our choices, the kinds of goals we set, and our motivation and willpower to follow through.
Social influences can be both positive or negative - or a combination of both!
The key is to get clear on how your friends, family, and even your colleagues may be impacting your behavior so that you can leverage that to your benefit OR at least not be blindsided.
Before you can break old patterns, it’s important to get a better understanding of how your family of origin AND your current social network (adult family, friends, colleagues) approaches food, exercise, and health in general.
Below, you’ll find 4 key questions that will help you get clear on how your social circle may be helping or hindering your progress. (Be sure to listen to this podcast episode for discussion about each one):
Question 1.
What does your primary social activity consist of? (gatherings focused around food/drinks, hobbies, outdoor activities, etc.)
Action steps:
- Engage in hobbies together
- Just get together and hang out
- Take your kids or dogs to the park
- Reach out to a friend (or someone for a walk, hike, bike ride, etc. (activities that allow you to talk)
- Check out classes and groups focused on active hobbies or wellness activities (hiking club, walking group, yoga class, meditation group, etc.)
Question 2.
What is your family’s culture around food? (Do all social occasions revolve around food? Is affection and reward often food-related?)
Action steps:
- Start to integrate other activities into family gatherings (horseshoes, cornhole, board games)
- Use time together, rather than food, to celebrate, show your affection, reward behavior, or provide comfort.
- Move away from the clean your plate club AND the sense that you can’t throw away junk food leftovers. Keep in mind: “Free” food isn’t really free. Your body isn’t a garbage can and you likely have already spent money trying to lose weight or regain your health.
- Be willing to have the conversation with your family about your health priorities. Your change WILL impact them so get in front of it. Make sure they know it’s not a rejection of them.
- Do NOT assume the responsibility of trying to change others’ behavior. If you’re concerned about someone, lead quietly by example instead.
Question 3.
Do those closest to you view their health as important (not just weight)? (spouse, parents, close friends, etc)
Action steps:
- Initiate conversations that let your tribe know you’re not judging them or trying to get them to change.
- Humor helps “Eyes on your own plate”
- Be open to the idea of being a “healthy rebel”. If upgrading your health habits is important to you, it’s easier if you get used to doing things differently than others around you.
- If parents shamed you around food, body, or activity, you may have some work to unpack this. Do your best not to repeat this cycle with others. Shame is not a motivational tool.
Question 4:
Did you grow up with the sense that you can impact your health by making lifestyle changes or were you brought up to believe there’s nothing you can really do on your own to improve your health?
Action Steps:
- Keep a journal about your food, activity, sleep, and any health conditions or concerns. This will help you connect the dots between these behaviors and any changes you see in your health. We can overlook problems that go away and not correlate them to things like drinking more water, getting more sleep, eating higher quality food, daily walking, etc..
- Keep a folder of any lab tests you have run with your doctor. By getting these done periodically, this will give you another objective measure of the impact of your new habits.
- Celebrate non-scale victories. Don’t overlook improvements (energy, brain function, joints, mood, skin, etc.) just because the scale isn’t moving. A gratitude journal or segment of your journal is a great way to highlight wins, big or small.
Getting clear on how our upbringing and our social network influence our behavior and what we believe we’re capable of achieving is critical if we are to avoid repeated cycles of trying and failing to make changes.
The more you’re aware of, the easier it will be to set yourself up for success, regardless of what others are saying, thinking, or doing.
Questions? Feedback? Please connect with us on our Facebook page!
xo,
Jenny and Lisa, co-hosts
The Mind Your Body Podcast
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